GUIDE FOR CONSCIOUS HEALING
  • Home
  • Services
    • Mentor, Muse, Consultant
    • The Emotion Code & The Body Code
    • Biodynamic Craniosacral Therapy
    • Breathwork Intensive
  • About
    • About Xochitl
    • Spiritual Midwifery
  • Cost & Connecting
  • Wild Words Poetry Blog
  • Ecos de la Marea Cave Ceremonies
Picture

Come with me into the expansive gift of poetry to experience a disruption of habitual ways of thinking and perceiving. The magic of poetry happens when it is spoken, heard and felt as vibrations in your body.

In this blog I offer you heartfelt, homemade recordings of some of my favorite poems. I invite you also to spend time with their pulsing vibrations and pregnant pauses, to savor the luscious sensual syllables on your tongue, and to feel the subtle changes in your being as you play with the poems.

Listen, read and then slowly speak them out loud. The medicine of poetry will endlessly surprise and delight you as a portal into your own wild multidimensionality!

Sign up to receive poems weekly

Astonishment, for Equinox

9/22/2024

 
Picture

​There is a silence in the beginning.
The life within us grows quiet.
There is little fear. No matter
how all this comes out, from now on
it cannot not exist ever again.
*
The present pushes back the life of regret.
It draws forward the life of desire. Soon memory
will have started sticking itself all over us.
We were fashioned from clay in a hurry,
poor throwing may mean it didn’t matter
to the makers if their pots cracked.
*
On the mountain tonight the full moon
faces the full sun. Now could be the moment
when we fall apart or we become whole.
Our time seems to be up—I think I even hear it stopping.
Then why have we kept up the singing for so long?
Because that’s the sort of determined creature we are.
Before us, our first task is to astonish,
and then, harder by far, to be astonished.

We come to be astonished. To be reminded that the world—this life—is still full
of astonishing things: unexplainable acts of goodness, stunning beauty,
impossible hope.

We come because we need—every one of us—to fall to our knees from time to
time, in wonder. In awe. 

​    - Galway Kinnell

The Thing About Dying

6/23/2024

 
Picture
The thing about dying is
I won’t get over it.
I can’t say, well
that sure taught me a lesson–
let’s go home and have a drink.
Impossible to believe
in my own ending.
I’ll continue on somewhere, find myself
in the barren halls of Bardo
waiting for a spare embryo,
eager to curl up inside some woman’s belly,
ready for the next round of traumas.
My turn for famine. Or torture.
Payback for those things I did to my sister.
I really don’t think I’ll come back as a snail
or a flea, I’m almost sure
I’ve got that sort of thing behind me.
But suppose it really is absolute
darkness descending and nothing
to follow. Not even silence.
(Silence needs someone to notice it.)
Never to see the high-flying blue
and white sky again.
Or the sea.
The sea.
That powerful wide-winged old woman.
Every time I look, she’s there where I left her.
When I die, I doubt
she will stay on very long without me.
The waves rolling in
without my praise to assist them.
No, if there’s nothing
after I die, if it really is the end,
I’ll have to take the sea with me when I leave.
Forgive me.

​    - Mildred Tremblay


Encounter

10/8/2023

 
Picture
Photo by Max LaRochelle

You there.
Have you forgotten something?
Something about choosing?
Look around: is this the world you promised yourself?

I want to know who you could become
if the conditions were just right.
I want to know the you that's possible
with just enough thunder
and just enough sun.

Who taught you the human smile,
and did it ever land
in the living tissues of your human heart
beating miracles for free--
or is your face always onstage?

When you speak do you hear that one
as the oldest friend
since your microcosmic firework of conception,
which made creatures of the earth and sky alike
shudder with jollity and not know why,

or does your own voice
still sound to you like a stranger?
I want to know if you need permission
to arrive home right now
into your body longing to learn you.

Do you know breath as always a holy door?
Who are you when you breathe
down deep, at last allowed to feel it all,
and your hair bursts into flame, and you remember:

we don't choose once and it's over,
but are asked to re-engage in every instant.
Look around: this very world
needs your arrival now, like sun
and like thunder, now and now and now.

​    - Brooke McNamara

The Lanyard

8/6/2023

 
This poem is in honor of Ezra, my second son,
who leaves home this week
​to make his own way in the world,
to follow his heart...

​The other day I was ricocheting slowly
off the blue walls of this room,
moving as if underwater from typewriter to piano,
from bookshelf to an envelope lying on the floor,
when I found myself in the L section of the dictionary
where my eyes fell upon the word lanyard.

No cookie nibbled by a French novelist
could send one into the past more suddenly--
a past where I sat at a workbench at a camp
by a deep Adirondack lake
learning how to braid long thin plastic strips
into a lanyard, a gift for my mother.

I had never seen anyone use a lanyard
or wear one, if that’s what you did with them,
but that did not keep me from crossing
strand over strand again and again
until I had made a boxy
red and white lanyard for my mother.

She gave me life and milk from her breasts,
and I gave her a lanyard.
She nursed me in many a sick room,
lifted spoons of medicine to my lips,
laid cold face-cloths on my forehead,
and then led me out into the airy light

and taught me to walk and swim,
and I, in turn, presented her with a lanyard.
Here are thousands of meals, she said,
and here is clothing and a good education.
And here is your lanyard, I replied,
which I made with a little help from a counselor.

Here is a breathing body and a beating heart,
strong legs, bones and teeth,
and two clear eyes to read the world, she whispered,
and here, I said, is the lanyard I made at camp.
And here, I wish to say to her now,
is a smaller gift—not the worn truth

that you can never repay your mother,
but the rueful admission that when she took
the two-tone lanyard from my hand,
I was as sure as a boy could be
that this useless, worthless thing I wove
out of boredom would be enough to make us even.

    - Billy Collins

Much more than even
so, SO much more than even...

this kid, his heart, my heart...
Go my wild sweet...held, beheld...
emerge with widened wings...

Picture

​Two years ago my first son, Silas, left home. You can check out the Kahlil Gibran poem here:
www.guideforconscioushealing.com/wild-words-poetry-blog/lifes-longing-for-itself

Manifesto: The Mad Farmer Liberation Front

7/2/2023

 
Picture
Love the quick profit, the annual raise,
vacation with pay. Want more
of everything ready-made. Be afraid
to know your neighbors and to die.
And you will have a window in your head.
Not even your future will be a mystery
any more. Your mind will be punched in a card
and shut away in a little drawer.
When they want you to buy something
they will call you. When they want you
to die for profit they will let you know.

So, friends, every day do something
that won’t compute. Love the Lord.
Love the world. Work for nothing.
Take all that you have and be poor.
Love someone who does not deserve it.
Denounce the government and embrace
the flag. Hope to live in that free
republic for which it stands.
Give your approval to all you cannot
understand. Praise ignorance, for what man
has not encountered he has not destroyed.

Ask the questions that have no answers.
Invest in the millennium. Plant sequoias.
Say that your main crop is the forest
that you did not plant,
that you will not live to harvest.
Say that the leaves are harvested
when they have rotted into the mold.
Call that profit. Prophesy such returns.

Put your faith in the two inches of humus
that will build under the trees
every thousand years.
Listen to carrion — put your ear
close, and hear the faint chattering
of the songs that are to come.
Expect the end of the world. Laugh.
Laughter is immeasurable. Be joyful
though you have considered all the facts.
So long as women do not go cheap
for power, please women more than men.
Ask yourself: Will this satisfy
a woman satisfied to bear a child?
Will this disturb the sleep
of a woman near to giving birth?

​Go with your love to the fields.
Lie easy in the shade. Rest your head
in her lap. Swear allegiance
to what is nighest your thoughts.
As soon as the generals and the politicos
can predict the motions of your mind,
lose it. Leave it as a sign
to mark the false trail, the way
you didn’t go. Be like the fox
who makes more tracks than necessary,
some in the wrong direction.
Practice resurrection.

    - Wendell Berry

Earth, Isn't This What You Want? (excerpt)

4/23/2023

 
Picture
Under Redwood by Michael Zieve
www.artworkarchive.com/profile/michael-zieve

​Earth, isn’t this what you want? To arise in us, invisible?
Is it not your dream, to enter us so wholly
there’s nothing left outside us to see?
What, if not transformation
is your deepest purpose? Earth, my love,
I want it too. Believe me,
no more of your springtimes are needed
to win me over—even one flower
is more than enough. Before I was named
I belonged to you. I see no other law
but yours, and know I can trust
the death you will bring.
​
See, I live. On what?
Childhood and future are equally present.
Sheer abundance of being
floods my heart.
​
    - Rainer Maria Rilke, from The Ninth Duino Elegy
translation by Anita Burrows and Joanna Macy

******************************

Earth, isn't this what you want: invisibly
to arise in us? Is it not your dream
to be some day invisible? Earth! Invisible!
What, if not transformation, is your insistent commission?
Earth, dear one, I will! Oh, believe it needs
not one more of your springtimes to win me over.
One, just one, is already too much for my blood.
From afar I'm utterly determined to be yours.
You were always right and your sacred revelation is the intimate death.

Behold, I'm alive. On what? Neither childhood nor future
grows less...surplus of existence
is welling up in my heart.

    - Rainer Maria Rilke,
from The Ninth Duino Elegy
translation by C. F. MacIntyre

******************************


Earth, isn’t this what you want: to arise within us,
invisible? Isn’t it your dream
to be wholly invisible someday? –O Earth: invisible
What, if not transformation, is your urgent command?
Earth, my dearest, I will. Oh believe me, you no longer
need your springtimes to win me over – one of them,
ah, even one, is already too much for my blood.
Unspeakably I have belonged to you, from the first.
You were always right, and your holiest inspiration
is our intimate companion, Death.  

Look, I am living. On what? Neither childhood nor future
grows any smaller… Superabundant being
wells up in my heart.

    
 - Rainer Maria Rilke, from The Ninth Duino Elegy
​translation by Stephen Mitchell

Born Again

3/26/2023

 
Picture

Let's be clear about this:
It isn't the same as being sick
and getting better. It isn't 
changing your mind at the last minute
or pushing away from the brink.
The only way to be born again
is to die. The Phoenix doesn't just
go up in a blaze of glory. It
feels the fire lick up and sizzle
every feather, until each quill becomes
a column of flame carried straight to the core.
Whatever the legend of re-birth, there is always
time in the fire, under the ground,
hanging on the cross or the tree.
Don't skip over that part of the story.
If you would be reborn, you have to die.
But what then? After the dying
how are we to rise again into new life?
The earth, the hero, the god, you and I--
how does any of us find our way back
from the Valley of the Shadow?
The same way we die:
Walk into the light.

​    - Lynn Ungar
Picture
In honor of Erin Dolan
January 6, 1973 - March 22, 2023

And Soon, for Spring Equinox

3/19/2023

 
Picture

It is too easy to become overwhelmed
by the suffering in the world
and the only prayer one can muster
is for the qualities of surrender
be made visible
and soon

As the way dawn light
caresses our dreams
when we dare to raise our face
towards the hope of winterlight

When the end of the day arrives
we slip off the woolen cloak of sacrifice
so heavy it threatens
to tip over the chair
by the weight of it

Yes we have courted bitterness
the tannin lingering on our lips
but once we are no longer willing
to remain a prisoner to resentment

We begin to call back
the known
the true essence
of who we once were
before we became
victim to the unbearable

And this is the trial of love
that we are born to

This unspeakable price
we pay to dance
    such a short while to
    this earthly music
    in the deepest hours of night

So that we will emerge
    more light filled
    than before.

    - Kristy Hellum
Picture

Mother Raven

1/8/2023

 
Picture
We cannot live without the night,
gossamer veils of emptiness.
The Goddess is black,
but each pore of her body
emits a rainbow.
Motionless, she watches
beyond care, yet flows
like a river of healing.
Doesn't dark energy circle us all
like Mother Raven?
Take root in your grief.
That is where the sun is born.
Ascend through a bolder falling.
Her womb is immaculate silence.
Her void is moist with stars.
Yet she who cradles them all
has become your breath.
Haven't I told you there is wine
in the void between thoughts,
Joy and sorrow mingled in one cup?
Now taste, and who knows
if tonight you might not finally
embrace the fierce beauty
of your beaten heart?

- Alfred K. LaMotte

Gentle

11/13/2022

 
Picture

A gentler world begins
in the way you touch your heart.
Be soft with the light inside you.
Caress your body with this breath.
God is nothing else
but the place where the sun comes up
in your chest.
You are the glimmering destination.
You are the golden honey daubed
on the bread of the ordinary.
Whatever is perfect,
whatever is heavenly,
begins here.

​    - Alfred LaMotte

<<Previous
    Picture
    Xochi Trout
    Sign up for weekly poems here

    Archives

    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    June 2024
    May 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020

    Categories

    All
    Adrift
    Aging
    Angel
    Anger
    Animal
    Arm
    Beach
    Beauty
    Being
    Belly
    Bird
    Birth
    Blossoming
    Blossoms
    Body
    Born
    Breathe
    Circle
    Consciousness
    Dance
    Darkness
    Death
    Dream
    Earth
    Eggs
    Energy
    Ey
    Eyes
    Face
    Fear
    Feet
    Feminine
    Fire
    Flow
    Flower
    Food
    Forest
    Forgiveness
    Fruit
    Gentleness
    God
    Goddess
    Grace
    Gratitude
    Grief
    Hand
    Head
    Healing
    Heart
    Holiness
    Holy
    Home
    Humility
    Hungry
    Infinity
    Innocence
    Journey
    Joy
    Jungle
    Kindness
    Knowing
    Leaf
    Life
    Light
    Liminal Space
    Listening
    Loneliness
    Longing
    Love
    Mind
    Moon
    Mother
    Mountains
    Music
    Mystery
    Naked
    Nature
    Night
    Nothing
    Ocean
    Peace
    Plant Medicine
    Poetry
    Portal
    Pray
    Prayer
    Presence
    Purpose
    Rain
    Reality
    Rebirth
    Remember
    River
    Rocks
    Rose
    Sacred
    Self
    Serpent
    Shadow
    Silence
    Sky
    Snow
    Song
    Soul
    Spirit
    Spring
    Stars
    Stillness
    Storm
    Story
    Suffering
    Summer
    Sun
    Surrender
    Thirst
    Tree
    Trust
    Truth
    Turtle
    Water
    Wild
    Wilderness
    Wind
    Wings
    Winter
    Wonder
    World
    Yes

    RSS Feed

Sign up below to receive my newsletter and updates on events and workshops.

* indicates required
  • Home
  • Services
    • Mentor, Muse, Consultant
    • The Emotion Code & The Body Code
    • Biodynamic Craniosacral Therapy
    • Breathwork Intensive
  • About
    • About Xochitl
    • Spiritual Midwifery
  • Cost & Connecting
  • Wild Words Poetry Blog
  • Ecos de la Marea Cave Ceremonies