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This sense that something went wrong. The sense that we have fallen and taken the world down with us. The sense that all might have turned out better had she not made some colossal mistake in the beginning. The sense that nature disapproves, and every flower is shouting about the impending cataclysm because a dark mother tasted the fruit of unbearable joy. Dear friend, don't you know that humans hesitate and cower before uncertainty age after age, inventing this story again and again? It's how we feel when we don't know how to breathe, when we don't know how to pause between heartbeats, to savor the delicate bouquet of this moment. Some say heaven will appear when this tribulation is over. I say heaven is an infinitesimal grain of silence at the tip of your exhalation, just before you receive the gift of another breath. Meet me here. We'll dance barefoot in the garden where nothing ever went wrong, and there was only one tree, whose roots went deep into the loam, whose branches bent down with clusters of ripening sweet stars, and a sparkling serpent spiraled up the spine of the Goddess. The serpent was Wisdom. The Goddess was Eve. She marveled at the dust in the palm of her hand, blew upon it, and created a Man. - Alfred LaMotte
I am soft today. Soft as shortbread dough fresh off the mixer, liquored by an extract of vanilla and spun with siftfuls of powdered sugar. And salt. Because when I say soft, I don’t really mean sweet. I mean the feeling around a streetlight on a quiet road, that miasmic halo that reveals the season’s lingering winged things aiming for the bulb’s muted warmth. Or when the market vendor, handing me a sheaf of kale, said it was so much better because of the frost. I’m not saying I am the frost, or the leaves, purple-green and pliant, spread across the palms of our half-gloved hands, but whatever middle it was that we met. Palm-soft. Air-soft. Truth-soft. Soft as whatever the sky is doing right this minute, shedding the day behind it. And in-betweenness where what’s next isn’t here yet. Or it is, and if I keep my breath soft enough, I’ll see it. - Maya Stein
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